If I must have computer systems with publicly available terminals, the maps they display of my complex will have a room clearly marked as the Main Control Room. This might come in the form of a distraction, vital clue, or morale boosting one-liner. I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the opposite sex. A fake set, directly connected to a multi-amp circuit, will occupy this location. Even if I dismiss my regular guards for a "private audience" with the Hero, these personal servants just so much furniture after all, right? If I am escaping in a large truck and the hero is pursuing me in a small Italian sports car, I will not wait for the hero to pull up along side of me and try to force him off the road as he attempts to climb aboard.
I will make alliances with those less powerful than myself. Likewise deep ocean rifts and untrammeled wilderness will also receive attention from the orbital bombardment planners. Whenever plans are drawn up that include a time-table, I'll post-date the completion 3 days after it's actually scheduled to occur and not worry too much if they get stolen. Even though I don't really care because I plan on living forever, I will hire engineers who are able to build me a fortress sturdy enough that, if I am slain, it won't tumble to the ground for no good structural reason. I can inspire loyalty with www. Amanda pulls off his pants and puts her hand on his boxers. Sex is certainly a weapon at my disposal, but then so is a blaster. One night at the campus bar, Simon meets Amanda. Also, I will order some to aim above, below, and to the sides so he cannot jump out of the way. Afterwards I will issue a press release regarding the hero's side's terroristic tactics. If I find they are happy and affectionate, I will ignore them. If I have several diabolical schemes to destroy the hero, I will set all of them in motion at once rather than wait for them to fail and launch them successively. They went that way! PTC complained that the performance contained a simulation of oral sex. The PTC also suggested that between 30 and 40 advertisers had pulled their commercials from WWF programming, an assertion that was not true. Even so, I will never fail to put up a serious effort to track or intercept him by other means as well. I will hire a talented fashion designer to create original uniforms for my Legions of Terror, as opposed to some cheap knock-offs that make them look like Nazi stormtroopers, Roman footsoldiers, or savage Mongol hordes. All midwives will be banned from the realm. If I take an Orphan as my own to corrupt I will be sure that no genetic relative exists to turn him or her against me. The generalizations from our experience with certain setups do seem to apply in my experience though. My main computers will have their own special operating system that will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Macintosh powerbooks. If I find my beautiful consort with access to my fortress has been associating with the hero, I'll have her executed. Thus if the control is ever broken, it will not immediately come after me for revenge. Especially if the quality is viriginity and the victim is the hero's girlfriend. But recent times have seen a dramatic increase in cases of performance anxiety related ED.
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Sex & Relationships - The Idiot's Guide to Smart People
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